Post by To Be Announced on Nov 13, 2012 13:39:34 GMT -5
Bags of ice for my neck, a slightly battered back and bruises all over my body. Last week I was the punching bag for a former member of the fucking Black Mafia, and needless to say I got my ass handed to me! And just seven nights after that beating, I have to go toe to toe with that psychotic freak Kuk Killswitch under X-Core rules. Week after week I take a beating, with little to no chance for recovery, but to be totally honest, after all the chair shots, after all the powerbombs, and after losing all that blood, what happened last week hurt me the most. In just over two weeks, Ms. Biguns, the love of my life, will become Mrs. Clash. I wish I could just give in and say congratulations, and I wish I could be happy for her, but the bottom line is that I can't. And you know why?
Sweeney: Yo dude! How's it going?
Dammit, can't I visit the doctor in peace!?
Chicken: Meh, I've been worse...
Sweeney: Yeah I know you have. But listen, I've been trying to call you all day! Switch your phone on once in a while!
Chicken: What's up?
Sweeney: I got a call from Tasha Jordan, you know, that chick that you fancy...
Chicken: Whoa whoa there...I do like her but I don't fancy her, okay?
Sweeney: Whatever. But anyway, I said she's been trying to call you. Apparently she can't make it to dinner again this weekend.
You're kidding me. Again? Seriously?
Sweeney: I'm sorry bro.
Chicken: Nah it's fine. Don't worry about it. I'm kinda used to it now.
Sweeney: I'm sorry dude, don't be like that.
Chicken: Like what? It's the same old story over and over again isn't it? I barely get to talk to a girl at all, and whenever I do get close to one, for some reason I wind up thinking that she could be the one, and I end up getting hurt when I realize that she doesn't like me in the same way! I don't know what is wrong with me...
Sweeney: Again, I'm sorry dude, I know it must be hard. But listen, you've got to stay focused on your next match...
Oh yes, my match against Kuk Killswitch, the guy who looks like a fucking pedophile...
Sweeney: ...you can't let these women ruin your career...
Chicken: ...and then there's Ms. Biguns! Ever since I first laid my eyes on her, I knew that she would be different. I know how badly she's treated me since I first got here, but I always convinced myself that she would eventually love me back the same way I love her! But now she's getting married...
Sweeney: Look, maybe it's for the best...
Chicken: ...what I can't stand though is that she is getting married to that sleazy piece of garbage Johnny Clash! She could do so much more. But you know what? I don't think their love is mutual. Have you noticed the way he talks to her, or how he treats her? All he seems to care about is sex and I don't think he gives two shits about this wedding. In fact, I suspect something terrible is going to happen during this wedding, I don't know what, but definitely something horrible...
Sweeney: Well maybe it'd be better if you didn't stick your nose into their business...
Chicken: ...that's it isn't it? This wedding can't happen. I know he's planning to do something horrible to Ms. Biguns, and you know what? I can't let that happen! She deserves so much more than the crap she takes from him, and I refuse to let him put the icing on that cake! I know he doesn't love her, and I just can't let this wedding take place knowing that something terrible is going to happen to her!
Sweeney: Oh so what are you going to do huh? You think you're going to fly into the scene like Superman, carry her in your arms and live happily ever after together? Sorry to break it to you, but most chickens can't fly, and I don't think you'd even be able to lift that woman off the ground! Don't try to be the hero. This doesn't involve you. You stick your nose into their business, and then what? Who do you think Ms. Biguns will listen to, her fiance or some shrimp?
Shrimp huh? Thanks for being so kind Sweeney...
Sweeney: Seriously dude, I don't know what you think you can do but if you try to put a stop to this then you're probably gonna get hurt more than ever, and that's saying a lot! You've already got plenty to be worried about this week against Kuk Killswitch, can't you at least stay out of this until after this match?
Chicken: Alright fine, I'll keep my mouth shut until after the match...but after that match, if I'm still not convinced that he loves her, I will not be held responsible for my actions!
Sweeney: Whatever dude. Just be careful.
Yeah, whatever Sweeney! I've got a blog to update...just as soon as the doctor comes back...where the hell is he!?
Okay, so the doctor didn't turn up for another half hour, and apparently fit and healthy and ready for my match against Kuk Killswitch. And I'm glad, not just because I get to do what I love doing, but between you and me, I've been a little frustrated lately, mostly with girl problems, and I could do with letting off a bit of steam in the ring, especially without the limitations of a regular match. Thank fuck for X-Core rules, because now I get to take Kuk to the extreme! Problems aside, I intend to bring the fight to Kuk this week. You see I've heard what he's said about me, and already he's making the same mistake that most guys make around here. He doesn't seem to take me seriously, and that's where he's gonna fall. He's underestimating me, and if it takes swallowing what's left of his fucked up teeth to prove to him what a grave mistake that is then so be it! Oh, and you probably thought that I've forgotten about you attacking me that other week, too much of a pussy to face me without a mask, let alone man to man. Well I hope you're not going to be hiding behind a mask this week, because if you intend on annihilating me then I want to see the look on your ugly face when I take you down with me. Quite frankly, you shouldn't be worried about Ash Soulsfate, and you shouldn't be worried about Andre Dixon. You should be worried about me, and you know what? By the end of the week you're not only going to be worried about me, you're going to be afraid of me. This week you're messing with the wrong guy, so don't be surprised when you find your severed head on the other side of the ring. I've been in the ring with you before, but this time it's one on one, and this time I'm going to make you regret ever attacking me.
Sweeney: Yo dude! How's it going?
Dammit, can't I visit the doctor in peace!?
Chicken: Meh, I've been worse...
Sweeney: Yeah I know you have. But listen, I've been trying to call you all day! Switch your phone on once in a while!
Chicken: What's up?
Sweeney: I got a call from Tasha Jordan, you know, that chick that you fancy...
Chicken: Whoa whoa there...I do like her but I don't fancy her, okay?
Sweeney: Whatever. But anyway, I said she's been trying to call you. Apparently she can't make it to dinner again this weekend.
You're kidding me. Again? Seriously?
Sweeney: I'm sorry bro.
Chicken: Nah it's fine. Don't worry about it. I'm kinda used to it now.
Sweeney: I'm sorry dude, don't be like that.
Chicken: Like what? It's the same old story over and over again isn't it? I barely get to talk to a girl at all, and whenever I do get close to one, for some reason I wind up thinking that she could be the one, and I end up getting hurt when I realize that she doesn't like me in the same way! I don't know what is wrong with me...
Sweeney: Again, I'm sorry dude, I know it must be hard. But listen, you've got to stay focused on your next match...
Oh yes, my match against Kuk Killswitch, the guy who looks like a fucking pedophile...
Sweeney: ...you can't let these women ruin your career...
Chicken: ...and then there's Ms. Biguns! Ever since I first laid my eyes on her, I knew that she would be different. I know how badly she's treated me since I first got here, but I always convinced myself that she would eventually love me back the same way I love her! But now she's getting married...
Sweeney: Look, maybe it's for the best...
Chicken: ...what I can't stand though is that she is getting married to that sleazy piece of garbage Johnny Clash! She could do so much more. But you know what? I don't think their love is mutual. Have you noticed the way he talks to her, or how he treats her? All he seems to care about is sex and I don't think he gives two shits about this wedding. In fact, I suspect something terrible is going to happen during this wedding, I don't know what, but definitely something horrible...
Sweeney: Well maybe it'd be better if you didn't stick your nose into their business...
Chicken: ...that's it isn't it? This wedding can't happen. I know he's planning to do something horrible to Ms. Biguns, and you know what? I can't let that happen! She deserves so much more than the crap she takes from him, and I refuse to let him put the icing on that cake! I know he doesn't love her, and I just can't let this wedding take place knowing that something terrible is going to happen to her!
Sweeney: Oh so what are you going to do huh? You think you're going to fly into the scene like Superman, carry her in your arms and live happily ever after together? Sorry to break it to you, but most chickens can't fly, and I don't think you'd even be able to lift that woman off the ground! Don't try to be the hero. This doesn't involve you. You stick your nose into their business, and then what? Who do you think Ms. Biguns will listen to, her fiance or some shrimp?
Shrimp huh? Thanks for being so kind Sweeney...
Sweeney: Seriously dude, I don't know what you think you can do but if you try to put a stop to this then you're probably gonna get hurt more than ever, and that's saying a lot! You've already got plenty to be worried about this week against Kuk Killswitch, can't you at least stay out of this until after this match?
Chicken: Alright fine, I'll keep my mouth shut until after the match...but after that match, if I'm still not convinced that he loves her, I will not be held responsible for my actions!
Sweeney: Whatever dude. Just be careful.
Yeah, whatever Sweeney! I've got a blog to update...just as soon as the doctor comes back...where the hell is he!?
Okay, so the doctor didn't turn up for another half hour, and apparently fit and healthy and ready for my match against Kuk Killswitch. And I'm glad, not just because I get to do what I love doing, but between you and me, I've been a little frustrated lately, mostly with girl problems, and I could do with letting off a bit of steam in the ring, especially without the limitations of a regular match. Thank fuck for X-Core rules, because now I get to take Kuk to the extreme! Problems aside, I intend to bring the fight to Kuk this week. You see I've heard what he's said about me, and already he's making the same mistake that most guys make around here. He doesn't seem to take me seriously, and that's where he's gonna fall. He's underestimating me, and if it takes swallowing what's left of his fucked up teeth to prove to him what a grave mistake that is then so be it! Oh, and you probably thought that I've forgotten about you attacking me that other week, too much of a pussy to face me without a mask, let alone man to man. Well I hope you're not going to be hiding behind a mask this week, because if you intend on annihilating me then I want to see the look on your ugly face when I take you down with me. Quite frankly, you shouldn't be worried about Ash Soulsfate, and you shouldn't be worried about Andre Dixon. You should be worried about me, and you know what? By the end of the week you're not only going to be worried about me, you're going to be afraid of me. This week you're messing with the wrong guy, so don't be surprised when you find your severed head on the other side of the ring. I've been in the ring with you before, but this time it's one on one, and this time I'm going to make you regret ever attacking me.