Post by Roxi Johnson on Nov 21, 2012 21:00:20 GMT -5
There's something to be said when you just aren't getting respect. Despite winning the MPW Television championship, it seems that no one seems to have any respect for me.
Brandon Nytrus, despite his track record of failure, is still telling everyone who will listen that he's going to just beat me for my championship. I know, just so strange. He challenged me to Hell in A Cell match at Uncivil War. Because apparently, I'm supposed to be intimidated by a large man wanted to trap me in a cage. Let me explain this quickly Brandon: Nothing you do or say will intimidate me. Nothing. I have been TV champion for almost a month, and I've got no reason to be afraid. I save the world from guys bigger and stronger than you. Some have superpowers. Some shoot guns at me. It comes with the territory. And in the end, I'm still here, and most of them are in jail. So you can keep thinking that it's going to be a cakewalk, but when you end up beaten, once again, you'll have no one to blame but yourself.
Now, I'm not going to spend my entire time talking about you, since I have a match against Tyler Rose. But understand that you didn't impress me, or anyone else, by beating Jason Xavier. I've done that, and I still get nothing for it.
I mean, I'm on a four match win streak. I beat Bloodhound at Aftershock, beat him again in a tag match, beat both TJ Pain and Taufik in a TLC match for the title, then just beat my number one contender in a tag match. I haven't lost a match since Bloodhound cost me a match against Kuk Killswitch.
That was back in September.
The month of October and so far all of November, I am undefeated, and the TV champion.
But alas, it doesn't really seem to matter. Just listen to Tyler Rose. I mean, I guess that I should just not even bother trying to defeat him, since he seems to be on some kind of crusade to relevancy. He's going to climb the ladder of success here at my expense. And why does he need to do this? Because according to him, he's been overlooked as a contender. Yes, it's management's fault he's been stuck milling around. Or it could be that around the MPW locker rooms, he's only known as "The Porn Guy".
Sadly, I was actually expecting porno jokes, and I didn't get them. There's so much material there. So much you could have said, and...nothing. I mean, no "blowing your load"? or giving out "facials". Really? Nothing? If you're going to be the Porn Guy, you must embrace everything. All the puns, one-liners, and sexual innuendos. You can't be the Porn Guy and half-ass it, buddy. No matter how corny and dumb it is, you gotta go with it. It's what you bought into. Otherwise, why are you the Porn Guy? You can't be the lame Porn Guy. The "meh" Porn Guy. You gotta go for it.
Also, I just thought of another thing here. You're a porn guy, your finishing move is the "Money Shot" yet, you're in a profession where you wrestle with half naked men, the majority of your time. MPW doesn't have a lot of women around, just saying. But Whatever floats your boat, man. I'm not judging.
But I'm sure this is a welcome change for you. I'm sure you'll be..."up" for this match. you'll..."rise to the occasion." I'm sure you'll go "hard" in this match. And then, in the end when you're spent, and I have won again, you'll find some way to get a "release".
See? this isn't that difficult. I just did your shtick better than you.
The bottom line is this: I am the TV champion, I save the world, I'm on a win streak, and I have a date with a guy who screws nyphos and gets paid $800 from a sleazy sweaty guy in a trench coat. Then I have to get into a cell with almost 7 foot of hype who swears up and down that "this time will be different." And I'm going to beat them both. Yes, Tyler the Porn Guy, will be a notch on MY belt. And then Brandon can try to bother someone else with his scary talk.
But hey, Maybe Tyler will beat me. Maybe he will use me as a stepping stone. Maybe it's he who will take this championship from me. Maybe it's in the cards that "Playboy" Tyler Rose will get launched into super-stardom by laying on top of me for about 3 seconds...
But considering he thinks they sell "tickets" to Comic-Con, I somehow doubt it.
They sell badges. Badges. Don't threaten me with a good time when you have no idea what you're talking about.
Besides... I already have mine.
[/I]
[ Roxi sits in a limo driving to an unknown destination. She looks around nervously, but continues to talk to Vision on her phone. ]
Vision - It's going to be fine.
Roxi - Are you sure?
Vision - It's just a photoshoot.
Roxi - It just seems boring. What I wouldn't give for some fighting
Vision - You can't. Remember?
Roxi - I know.
Vision - It's a photoshoot for Esquire. It's a class organization. They make everyone look great.
Roxi - I'm not really that photogenic.
[ Vision rolls his eyes ]
Roxi - What?
Vision - You take photos on your butt and post them online.
Roxi - So?
Vision - ...Nevermind. Just, have some fun.
Roxi - I'm trying. I'm getting so bored with this stuff I'm joining twitter trends.
Vision - Maybe after this shoot, you'll be trending.
Roxi - Maybe. That would be cool.
Vision - See, you're having more fun already.
Roxi - ....Very funny.
Vision - What?
Roxi - Just so people like Tyler Rose can oogle me in a magazine.
Vision - Better there then physically touching you right?
Roxi - I guess. But then again, I fit the criteria for him: A pair of boobs and a vagina.
Vision - That's his standard?
Roxi - Is there any other for pornstars?
Vision - Touche'
[ The limo pulls to a stop ]
Roxi - Looks like we're here. Wish me luck!
Vision - Good luck, and have fun!
[ Roxi is guided into the building where her shoot is taking place.
Wow. This place is huge. Looks kinda small on the outside.
[ Eventually, she is greeted by David Granger, editor in chief of Maxim. ]
David Granger - Hello Roxi, I'm Dan Bova.
Roxi - Nice to meet you.
David Granger - Likewise. I've been hearing some great things about you. Love your work.
Roxi - Wow, thanks.
David Granger - So, Let me show you where you're shooting.
Roxi - Great. Lead the way.
David Granger - Follow me.
[ Roxi follows David to an empty set with lighting and a bed and other things for the shoot. ]
David Granger - This is it. Once again, it's great to meet you, and to work with you.
Roxi - Likewise.
David Granger - So, you excited?
Roxi - Yeah. A little.
David Granger - Don't worry, Nate and Audrey are going to take good care of you. Also, Michael will be doing your interview.
Roxi - Sounds great.
David Granger - Okay, I'll let Nate take it from here, and I look forward to seeing the results.
Roxi - I hope it looks good.
David Granger - Me too, catch you later.
[ David shakes her hand then turns and leaves. Nate, the photographer walks up to her. ]
Roxi - You must be Nate.
Nate - That's me.
Roxi - You're going to make me look good, right?
Nate - I do my best. Audrey does a lot of the magic, I just take pictures.
Roxi - Modest I see.
Nate - I try to be humble. I mean, thousands of guys read this magazine. So, I try to make the ladies I shoot look good.
Roxi - Well, I'm counting on you.
Nate - I'll do my best. Audrey is waiting for you in the dressing room right back there. You can change and get ready. I've still got a few items to set up.
Roxi - Thanks Nate.
[ Roxi walks into the dressing room and sits in her chair. ]
Audrey - Hello Roxi, how are you.
Roxi - It's a good day, I guess. I can't complain.
Audrey - Well, you could.
Roxi - But who'd listen?
[ They share a laugh]
Audrey - So, you ready to shoot?
Roxi - Yeah. I think so.
Audrey - A little nervous?
Roxi - Yeah, a little, Never really done anything like this before.
Audrey - Don't worry. It'll be great. Nate's great.
Roxi - I sure hope so.
Audrey - Well, let's get you all sexy.
Roxi - Okay.
Audrey - Take off your shirt.
[ Roxi stares at Audrey. ]
Roxi - ...Excuse me?
Audrey - Take off your shirt. I don't want to ruin your shirt with the makeup.
Roxi - Uh...okay.
Roxi removes her shirt and eases back in the chair. Fade. ]
[ Roxi has finished getting her make-up, and walks out in her robe. ]
Nate - Hey Roxi, we'll be ready in a few seconds.
Roxi - Okay.
Man it's cold. I'm going to start nipping out if this keeps up.
Nate - There, looks like we're ready.
[ Roxi removes her robe, clad in her outfit for the shoot. She walks up to Nate. ]
Roxi - Well?
Nate - I'd like to do the actual cover shot. So, we need you over here with this mask.
Roxi - What's the mask for?
Nate - Well, you like the superhero stuff, so the cover shot plan was you taking off that mask all sexy like. The tag line is "Roxi Johnson: MPW's Superhero unmasked" Sounds cool right?
Roxi - ...R...right.
Nate - Something wrong?
Roxi - No! er...no. It sounds great.
Nate - Great.
[ Roxi moves into position with the lone ranger type mask on her face. Nate starts taking photos as Roxi removes the mask slowly and seductively and such. ]
Nate - Great. Great stuff. I like it. Perfect.
Roxi - I take I'm doing a good job?
Nate - Fantastic.
Roxi - Was that a response, or you continuing to hurl compliments?
Nate - No, it really is great. You're a natural. You sure this isn't your first time?
Roxi - It is. I swear.
Nate - Could have fooled me. Anyway, that shots in the bag, so we can move on.
Roxi - Great.
[ We flash forward to later in the shoot, and Roxi is wearing a different outfit. Nate shoots the photos and they're done. ]
Roxi - This has been a lot of fun.
Nate - It's been great.
Roxi - I have to say though, this is some really tiny underwear. I can't imagine wearing this anywhere else.
Nate - It's what they like. Well, look like we need one final spread and then you can get dressed an conduct your interview.
Roxi - Okay.
Nate - Did you bring your championship belt?
Roxi - Yeah, you guys asked me to.
Nate - Great.
A stage hand hands Roxi her title.
Roxi - So, what are we doing?
Nate - Well, we'd like a couple of shots of you with the belt.
Roxi - Oh, sounds great.
Nate - Yeah, so go ahead and take your top off.
[ Roxi gives Nate a stunned look. ]
Roxi - Excuse me?
Nate - You're top. If you could take it off for the shot.
Roxi - I already took my shirt off.
Nate - I know. I'm talking about the bra top.
Roxi - What...why?
Nate - For the shot. We'll have you pose with the belt over your chest.
Roxi - ...I thought this was a classy group. You're all perverts!
Nate - Nobody here is going to judge you.
Roxi - ...ugh....Alright.
Nate - Great.
[ After that the shoot is over. Roxi starts to re-dress in her dressing room, when there's a knock. ]
Roxi - Yes?
Michael - Ms. Johnson? I'm Michael, Michael Anderson. I'm conducting the interview.
Roxi - Right. I'll be out in a second.
Michael - Just look for me, I'll be finishing up another interview.
Roxi - Alright, thank you.
Michael - No problem.
[ Roxi quickly finishes re-dressing and heads out to find Michael. ]
Roxi - Ah, there he is.
[ She walks over, and sees Michael, who is still interviewing. ]
Michael - Hey, I'll be done in a sec.
Roxi - Oh, alright.
Michael - Have you met Mr. Limbaugh?
Roxi - ...Uh...no.
[ From his chair, the famous talk show host stands, and smiles. ]
Michael - Rush Limbaugh, this is Roxi Johnson.
Roxi - Hi.
[ He holds his hand out, and Roxi holds hers out, and Rush grabs it and kisses it. ]
Oh...GROSS!
Rush Limbaugh - How are you my dear?
Roxi - I'm...great.
Rush Limbaugh - What is it you do?
Roxi - I...wrestle.
Rush Limbaugh - Oh, you're one of those wrestler babes? Wearing all that tight spandex and wrestling around with other girls?
Roxi - ....Y...Yeah.
Rush Limbaugh - Fantastic. Doing something you're good at. Well, I've got to run, I'll obviously be on the radio and I'll tell them to check out your show.
Roxi - Thanks....I guess...
Rush Limbaugh - Good-bye Michael, Good-bye my dear.
[ Rush walks up to Roxi and kisses her on the cheek before departing. ]
Really? This guy just kisses me!?
Michael - Well, you can have a seat.
Roxi - ...Yeah.
She sits down, still stunned that Rush Limbaugh kissed her. ]
Michael - You alright?
Roxi - Yeah...I'm good.
Michael - He's actually a nice guy.
Roxi - And a chauvinist.
Michael - True, but let's talk about you.
Roxi - Okay.
Michael - So, when did you get into wrestling?
Roxi - I've been a fan for a while. I did ballet when I was 8 and theatre and gymnastics in high school. All three combine into pro wrestling.
Michael - So, with all that, I'd imagine you're pretty flexible?
Roxi - ...I...Yeah, I am.
Michael - Sweet. So when you got into wrestling, was it what you expected?
Roxi - I trained with nothing but guys. I was the only girl out of a class of 22. The trainers try to smoke you out, to see if you'll take the beating and keep coming back. I kept coming back.
Michael - Did they treat you any differently?
Roxi - No.
Michael - So, outside the ring, I hear you're a big comic book nerd. Is that true?
Roxi - Yup.
Michael - Are you a marvel girl, or a DC girl?
Roxi - I read both. But Batman got me into comics. Then I started reading Spider-Man, Sandman, Y, And The Walking Dead.
Michael - Really? Ever wanted to be on the show?
Roxi - I hate the show, actually. Everyone on it besides Darryl and Andrea can go die. I actually cheered when Lori died.
Michael - Wow.
Roxi - I was just annoyed that zombies didn't eat her.
Michael - So, you're a big zombie fan too?
Roxi - Yeah. I love Horror in general. I will watch horror movies all day. Even if their bad.
Michael - What's bad?
Roxi - I just watched Two Headed Monster Shark. Brooke Hogan is in it.
Michael - Sounds awful.
Roxi - It's terrible. But as a horror fan, you take the bad with the good.
Michael - So, if you were in the Zombie apocalypse, how do you think you'd do?
Roxi - It depends, if the zombies are slow, I don't think I'd have a problem. If the zombies are fast...I'm not sure
Michael - I see. So, how did you stumble across MPW, where you are now in wrestling?
Roxi - Well, I was just looking for work. A lot of places don't want girls in them, or saddle girls with degrading stuff. I don't want to wrestle in Jell-O or Mud, or parade around in a bikini all the time. Sometimes that's required, but I didn't want it to be all I did.
Michael - And MPW gave you that chance?
Roxi - They did. I mean, They weren't like a lot of places who judge the girls simply based on looks. Or their bodies. You can be the most talented girl in the world, but it still comes down to if you have huge boobs or a big butt. MPW was different. I'm having a blast there, and I'm a major champion. I wrestle guys and girls all the time. I mean, I'm about to wrestle a porn star.
Michael - Really?
Roxi - Yeah. Where else but in Pro Wrestling can a girl who pretends to be a superhero wrestle a guy who does porn?
Michael - That's....a good question.
Roxi - It should be a lot of fun.
Michael - Does it bother you, to wrestle guys?
Roxi - No. I find it easier to wrestle a guy then a girl. With a guy, you can say anything to them, but girls are different. They only use a select number a words when talking about each other. Think about it. When girls dislike each other, it's a small list of insults. Then usually, they cat-fight after that.
Michael - Right. Uh...do you have a...boyfriend?
Roxi - No. It's really hard to have steady relationships when we're working every night, and occasionally leaving town for a big show. My travel schedule is crazy, so I couldn't expect the guy I was with to stay with me through all that.
Michael - So, you got nothing right now?
Roxi - I...get by.
Michael - What does that mean?
Roxi - I have everything I need, to keep myself occupied.
Michael - I see. Well, thanks for your time.
[ Roxi rides back in the limo. She talks to Vision on her phone. ]
Vision - So, how did it go?
Roxi - Good. I guess.
Vision - You mean you didn't have any fun?
Roxi - The shoot was fine...A little weird, but fine.
Vision - But did you have fun?
I did...until Rush Limbaugh kissed me. Twice. I'm never going to live that down. I swear if I see him again, I will kick him in the nuts.
Stupid Rush Limbaugh.
Brandon Nytrus, despite his track record of failure, is still telling everyone who will listen that he's going to just beat me for my championship. I know, just so strange. He challenged me to Hell in A Cell match at Uncivil War. Because apparently, I'm supposed to be intimidated by a large man wanted to trap me in a cage. Let me explain this quickly Brandon: Nothing you do or say will intimidate me. Nothing. I have been TV champion for almost a month, and I've got no reason to be afraid. I save the world from guys bigger and stronger than you. Some have superpowers. Some shoot guns at me. It comes with the territory. And in the end, I'm still here, and most of them are in jail. So you can keep thinking that it's going to be a cakewalk, but when you end up beaten, once again, you'll have no one to blame but yourself.
Now, I'm not going to spend my entire time talking about you, since I have a match against Tyler Rose. But understand that you didn't impress me, or anyone else, by beating Jason Xavier. I've done that, and I still get nothing for it.
I mean, I'm on a four match win streak. I beat Bloodhound at Aftershock, beat him again in a tag match, beat both TJ Pain and Taufik in a TLC match for the title, then just beat my number one contender in a tag match. I haven't lost a match since Bloodhound cost me a match against Kuk Killswitch.
That was back in September.
The month of October and so far all of November, I am undefeated, and the TV champion.
But alas, it doesn't really seem to matter. Just listen to Tyler Rose. I mean, I guess that I should just not even bother trying to defeat him, since he seems to be on some kind of crusade to relevancy. He's going to climb the ladder of success here at my expense. And why does he need to do this? Because according to him, he's been overlooked as a contender. Yes, it's management's fault he's been stuck milling around. Or it could be that around the MPW locker rooms, he's only known as "The Porn Guy".
Sadly, I was actually expecting porno jokes, and I didn't get them. There's so much material there. So much you could have said, and...nothing. I mean, no "blowing your load"? or giving out "facials". Really? Nothing? If you're going to be the Porn Guy, you must embrace everything. All the puns, one-liners, and sexual innuendos. You can't be the Porn Guy and half-ass it, buddy. No matter how corny and dumb it is, you gotta go with it. It's what you bought into. Otherwise, why are you the Porn Guy? You can't be the lame Porn Guy. The "meh" Porn Guy. You gotta go for it.
Also, I just thought of another thing here. You're a porn guy, your finishing move is the "Money Shot" yet, you're in a profession where you wrestle with half naked men, the majority of your time. MPW doesn't have a lot of women around, just saying. But Whatever floats your boat, man. I'm not judging.
But I'm sure this is a welcome change for you. I'm sure you'll be..."up" for this match. you'll..."rise to the occasion." I'm sure you'll go "hard" in this match. And then, in the end when you're spent, and I have won again, you'll find some way to get a "release".
See? this isn't that difficult. I just did your shtick better than you.
The bottom line is this: I am the TV champion, I save the world, I'm on a win streak, and I have a date with a guy who screws nyphos and gets paid $800 from a sleazy sweaty guy in a trench coat. Then I have to get into a cell with almost 7 foot of hype who swears up and down that "this time will be different." And I'm going to beat them both. Yes, Tyler the Porn Guy, will be a notch on MY belt. And then Brandon can try to bother someone else with his scary talk.
But hey, Maybe Tyler will beat me. Maybe he will use me as a stepping stone. Maybe it's he who will take this championship from me. Maybe it's in the cards that "Playboy" Tyler Rose will get launched into super-stardom by laying on top of me for about 3 seconds...
But considering he thinks they sell "tickets" to Comic-Con, I somehow doubt it.
They sell badges. Badges. Don't threaten me with a good time when you have no idea what you're talking about.
Besides... I already have mine.
[/I]
[ Roxi sits in a limo driving to an unknown destination. She looks around nervously, but continues to talk to Vision on her phone. ]
Vision - It's going to be fine.
Roxi - Are you sure?
Vision - It's just a photoshoot.
Roxi - It just seems boring. What I wouldn't give for some fighting
Vision - You can't. Remember?
Roxi - I know.
Vision - It's a photoshoot for Esquire. It's a class organization. They make everyone look great.
Roxi - I'm not really that photogenic.
[ Vision rolls his eyes ]
Roxi - What?
Vision - You take photos on your butt and post them online.
Roxi - So?
Vision - ...Nevermind. Just, have some fun.
Roxi - I'm trying. I'm getting so bored with this stuff I'm joining twitter trends.
Vision - Maybe after this shoot, you'll be trending.
Roxi - Maybe. That would be cool.
Vision - See, you're having more fun already.
Roxi - ....Very funny.
Vision - What?
Roxi - Just so people like Tyler Rose can oogle me in a magazine.
Vision - Better there then physically touching you right?
Roxi - I guess. But then again, I fit the criteria for him: A pair of boobs and a vagina.
Vision - That's his standard?
Roxi - Is there any other for pornstars?
Vision - Touche'
[ The limo pulls to a stop ]
Roxi - Looks like we're here. Wish me luck!
Vision - Good luck, and have fun!
[ Roxi is guided into the building where her shoot is taking place.
Wow. This place is huge. Looks kinda small on the outside.
[ Eventually, she is greeted by David Granger, editor in chief of Maxim. ]
David Granger - Hello Roxi, I'm Dan Bova.
Roxi - Nice to meet you.
David Granger - Likewise. I've been hearing some great things about you. Love your work.
Roxi - Wow, thanks.
David Granger - So, Let me show you where you're shooting.
Roxi - Great. Lead the way.
David Granger - Follow me.
[ Roxi follows David to an empty set with lighting and a bed and other things for the shoot. ]
David Granger - This is it. Once again, it's great to meet you, and to work with you.
Roxi - Likewise.
David Granger - So, you excited?
Roxi - Yeah. A little.
David Granger - Don't worry, Nate and Audrey are going to take good care of you. Also, Michael will be doing your interview.
Roxi - Sounds great.
David Granger - Okay, I'll let Nate take it from here, and I look forward to seeing the results.
Roxi - I hope it looks good.
David Granger - Me too, catch you later.
[ David shakes her hand then turns and leaves. Nate, the photographer walks up to her. ]
Roxi - You must be Nate.
Nate - That's me.
Roxi - You're going to make me look good, right?
Nate - I do my best. Audrey does a lot of the magic, I just take pictures.
Roxi - Modest I see.
Nate - I try to be humble. I mean, thousands of guys read this magazine. So, I try to make the ladies I shoot look good.
Roxi - Well, I'm counting on you.
Nate - I'll do my best. Audrey is waiting for you in the dressing room right back there. You can change and get ready. I've still got a few items to set up.
Roxi - Thanks Nate.
[ Roxi walks into the dressing room and sits in her chair. ]
Audrey - Hello Roxi, how are you.
Roxi - It's a good day, I guess. I can't complain.
Audrey - Well, you could.
Roxi - But who'd listen?
[ They share a laugh]
Audrey - So, you ready to shoot?
Roxi - Yeah. I think so.
Audrey - A little nervous?
Roxi - Yeah, a little, Never really done anything like this before.
Audrey - Don't worry. It'll be great. Nate's great.
Roxi - I sure hope so.
Audrey - Well, let's get you all sexy.
Roxi - Okay.
Audrey - Take off your shirt.
[ Roxi stares at Audrey. ]
Roxi - ...Excuse me?
Audrey - Take off your shirt. I don't want to ruin your shirt with the makeup.
Roxi - Uh...okay.
Roxi removes her shirt and eases back in the chair. Fade. ]
[ Roxi has finished getting her make-up, and walks out in her robe. ]
Nate - Hey Roxi, we'll be ready in a few seconds.
Roxi - Okay.
Man it's cold. I'm going to start nipping out if this keeps up.
Nate - There, looks like we're ready.
[ Roxi removes her robe, clad in her outfit for the shoot. She walks up to Nate. ]
Roxi - Well?
Nate - I'd like to do the actual cover shot. So, we need you over here with this mask.
Roxi - What's the mask for?
Nate - Well, you like the superhero stuff, so the cover shot plan was you taking off that mask all sexy like. The tag line is "Roxi Johnson: MPW's Superhero unmasked" Sounds cool right?
Roxi - ...R...right.
Nate - Something wrong?
Roxi - No! er...no. It sounds great.
Nate - Great.
[ Roxi moves into position with the lone ranger type mask on her face. Nate starts taking photos as Roxi removes the mask slowly and seductively and such. ]
Nate - Great. Great stuff. I like it. Perfect.
Roxi - I take I'm doing a good job?
Nate - Fantastic.
Roxi - Was that a response, or you continuing to hurl compliments?
Nate - No, it really is great. You're a natural. You sure this isn't your first time?
Roxi - It is. I swear.
Nate - Could have fooled me. Anyway, that shots in the bag, so we can move on.
Roxi - Great.
[ We flash forward to later in the shoot, and Roxi is wearing a different outfit. Nate shoots the photos and they're done. ]
Roxi - This has been a lot of fun.
Nate - It's been great.
Roxi - I have to say though, this is some really tiny underwear. I can't imagine wearing this anywhere else.
Nate - It's what they like. Well, look like we need one final spread and then you can get dressed an conduct your interview.
Roxi - Okay.
Nate - Did you bring your championship belt?
Roxi - Yeah, you guys asked me to.
Nate - Great.
A stage hand hands Roxi her title.
Roxi - So, what are we doing?
Nate - Well, we'd like a couple of shots of you with the belt.
Roxi - Oh, sounds great.
Nate - Yeah, so go ahead and take your top off.
[ Roxi gives Nate a stunned look. ]
Roxi - Excuse me?
Nate - You're top. If you could take it off for the shot.
Roxi - I already took my shirt off.
Nate - I know. I'm talking about the bra top.
Roxi - What...why?
Nate - For the shot. We'll have you pose with the belt over your chest.
Roxi - ...I thought this was a classy group. You're all perverts!
Nate - Nobody here is going to judge you.
Roxi - ...ugh....Alright.
Nate - Great.
[ After that the shoot is over. Roxi starts to re-dress in her dressing room, when there's a knock. ]
Roxi - Yes?
Michael - Ms. Johnson? I'm Michael, Michael Anderson. I'm conducting the interview.
Roxi - Right. I'll be out in a second.
Michael - Just look for me, I'll be finishing up another interview.
Roxi - Alright, thank you.
Michael - No problem.
[ Roxi quickly finishes re-dressing and heads out to find Michael. ]
Roxi - Ah, there he is.
[ She walks over, and sees Michael, who is still interviewing. ]
Michael - Hey, I'll be done in a sec.
Roxi - Oh, alright.
Michael - Have you met Mr. Limbaugh?
Roxi - ...Uh...no.
[ From his chair, the famous talk show host stands, and smiles. ]
Michael - Rush Limbaugh, this is Roxi Johnson.
Roxi - Hi.
[ He holds his hand out, and Roxi holds hers out, and Rush grabs it and kisses it. ]
Oh...GROSS!
Rush Limbaugh - How are you my dear?
Roxi - I'm...great.
Rush Limbaugh - What is it you do?
Roxi - I...wrestle.
Rush Limbaugh - Oh, you're one of those wrestler babes? Wearing all that tight spandex and wrestling around with other girls?
Roxi - ....Y...Yeah.
Rush Limbaugh - Fantastic. Doing something you're good at. Well, I've got to run, I'll obviously be on the radio and I'll tell them to check out your show.
Roxi - Thanks....I guess...
Rush Limbaugh - Good-bye Michael, Good-bye my dear.
[ Rush walks up to Roxi and kisses her on the cheek before departing. ]
Really? This guy just kisses me!?
Michael - Well, you can have a seat.
Roxi - ...Yeah.
She sits down, still stunned that Rush Limbaugh kissed her. ]
Michael - You alright?
Roxi - Yeah...I'm good.
Michael - He's actually a nice guy.
Roxi - And a chauvinist.
Michael - True, but let's talk about you.
Roxi - Okay.
Michael - So, when did you get into wrestling?
Roxi - I've been a fan for a while. I did ballet when I was 8 and theatre and gymnastics in high school. All three combine into pro wrestling.
Michael - So, with all that, I'd imagine you're pretty flexible?
Roxi - ...I...Yeah, I am.
Michael - Sweet. So when you got into wrestling, was it what you expected?
Roxi - I trained with nothing but guys. I was the only girl out of a class of 22. The trainers try to smoke you out, to see if you'll take the beating and keep coming back. I kept coming back.
Michael - Did they treat you any differently?
Roxi - No.
Michael - So, outside the ring, I hear you're a big comic book nerd. Is that true?
Roxi - Yup.
Michael - Are you a marvel girl, or a DC girl?
Roxi - I read both. But Batman got me into comics. Then I started reading Spider-Man, Sandman, Y, And The Walking Dead.
Michael - Really? Ever wanted to be on the show?
Roxi - I hate the show, actually. Everyone on it besides Darryl and Andrea can go die. I actually cheered when Lori died.
Michael - Wow.
Roxi - I was just annoyed that zombies didn't eat her.
Michael - So, you're a big zombie fan too?
Roxi - Yeah. I love Horror in general. I will watch horror movies all day. Even if their bad.
Michael - What's bad?
Roxi - I just watched Two Headed Monster Shark. Brooke Hogan is in it.
Michael - Sounds awful.
Roxi - It's terrible. But as a horror fan, you take the bad with the good.
Michael - So, if you were in the Zombie apocalypse, how do you think you'd do?
Roxi - It depends, if the zombies are slow, I don't think I'd have a problem. If the zombies are fast...I'm not sure
Michael - I see. So, how did you stumble across MPW, where you are now in wrestling?
Roxi - Well, I was just looking for work. A lot of places don't want girls in them, or saddle girls with degrading stuff. I don't want to wrestle in Jell-O or Mud, or parade around in a bikini all the time. Sometimes that's required, but I didn't want it to be all I did.
Michael - And MPW gave you that chance?
Roxi - They did. I mean, They weren't like a lot of places who judge the girls simply based on looks. Or their bodies. You can be the most talented girl in the world, but it still comes down to if you have huge boobs or a big butt. MPW was different. I'm having a blast there, and I'm a major champion. I wrestle guys and girls all the time. I mean, I'm about to wrestle a porn star.
Michael - Really?
Roxi - Yeah. Where else but in Pro Wrestling can a girl who pretends to be a superhero wrestle a guy who does porn?
Michael - That's....a good question.
Roxi - It should be a lot of fun.
Michael - Does it bother you, to wrestle guys?
Roxi - No. I find it easier to wrestle a guy then a girl. With a guy, you can say anything to them, but girls are different. They only use a select number a words when talking about each other. Think about it. When girls dislike each other, it's a small list of insults. Then usually, they cat-fight after that.
Michael - Right. Uh...do you have a...boyfriend?
Roxi - No. It's really hard to have steady relationships when we're working every night, and occasionally leaving town for a big show. My travel schedule is crazy, so I couldn't expect the guy I was with to stay with me through all that.
Michael - So, you got nothing right now?
Roxi - I...get by.
Michael - What does that mean?
Roxi - I have everything I need, to keep myself occupied.
Michael - I see. Well, thanks for your time.
[ Roxi rides back in the limo. She talks to Vision on her phone. ]
Vision - So, how did it go?
Roxi - Good. I guess.
Vision - You mean you didn't have any fun?
Roxi - The shoot was fine...A little weird, but fine.
Vision - But did you have fun?
I did...until Rush Limbaugh kissed me. Twice. I'm never going to live that down. I swear if I see him again, I will kick him in the nuts.
Stupid Rush Limbaugh.
