Post by Emi's Imaginary Friend on Aug 26, 2012 12:56:03 GMT -5
Believe it or not folks, Ms. Biguns had a date! Long story short, while at one of the Las Vegas bars the night before, she met a charming young man, in his early twenties, who seemed awfully interested in her. Normally she would dismiss most of her fans, but when the two started talking, she was completely smitten. Eventually it led to them exchanging phone numbers, and they had already made plans to meet for dinner the following night. At last, she was going to be treated with some class, dignity and respect...or so she thought...
Basically, they met up at a ritzy restaurant where her date was supposed to book a table. Unfortunately he did not, and so they ended up in a sleazy nightclub, not exactly the perfect substitute, and not exactly a comfortable place for Ms. Biguns to show off her new black strapless mini dress. I won't say how much it cost. Anyway, already the night was a disaster. Rather than calm music from the Baroque age and a fine cuisine on a plate, poor Ms. Biguns had to put up with loud drum 'n' bass banging while enduring sprinkles of various beverages from the hopping crowds. Not exactly how she had hoped to spend the evening. At least they managed to sit at table, if only it weren't so close to the stage of scantily clad women dancing around shamelessly.
As the night went on, it also turned out that this guy she had met was not exactly how she remembered. He seemed to enjoy her discomfort in such a vulgar place, much to her disgust, and in what little conversation they managed to have, he couldn't help but mention how big a fan he was of the MPW Television champion, a name that she preferred not to hear that night. She could have also done with his attempts to flatter her by complimenting the size of her breasts. Seriously, she was excited about this night, but quite frankly, she should have walked back home before going into the nightclub. Unfortunately this did not happen, and what happened next? From the leering stares that she received from the anonymous males in the crowd, her 'charming' date was led to believe that she did in fact work at this nightclub! What absolute cheek! He even asked for a private dance! Needless to say, that was the last straw. She had to get up and leave, but unfortunately there was only one way out, and that was through the rampant drunken crowd. She held her breath and dived in, trying to find the exit, but when she came out, she lost count of how many times she was squeezed, and there was even a tear on her new dress! So much for returning it to the store...
Well, so much for class, dignity and respect...it seems that poor Ms. Biguns just can't get a break! With her high-heels in her hands, she marched all the way back home, stripped herself off and climbed straight back into bed. She had to call it a night. Things couldn't possibly get any worse...
Meanwhile, at his apartment, John Fisherman was preparing himself. He had watched the promo from the Goddess Factor, and he felt that he needed to make some kind of response, and so he had invited Tasha Jordan back to his home for another interview. John was suddenly interrupted by the knock from the door. He opened the door and greeted Tasha and the camera crew. They immediately set up the camera, John and Tasha were hooked up to microphones and with little to no small chat, they were all ready to roll.
The camera zoomed in on Tasha's bust.
"Hello MPW universe, I'm Tasha Jordan once again speaking to you from the cozy home of the self-proclaimed king of the world, mister John Fisherman."
The camera zoomed out to reveal John Fisherman, relaxing on his beloved black leather couch, with a cynical look on his face.
"First of all John, thank you once again for letting us back into your home..."
"Of course it is my pleasure, but before I answer any of questions, let me just correct you for one second. Self-proclaimed? How very misleading. That implies that I bestowed that title on myself. No, it is a title that everyone will soon recognize me as. You think I call myself that just for laughs? No, as I will prove to you and everyone else very soon, I am the future of this business, and once I've finally claimed my spot on the throne, very soon you will all refer to me as the deserving king of the world!"
"Umm...I apologize...but that is a very tall order, especially for someone who has only won one match since signing up with MPW..."
"I thought I already explained that Natasha. With every kingdom, there are enemies, enemies that are out to stop you from claiming what is rightfully yours. I've been robbed from opportunity after opportunity, I've been attacked from behind and I've been screwed out of easy matches. Every king has enemies, but unfortunately for them, nothing will be able to stop my rise to fame and glory."
Tasha coughed out of the awkward silence that followed.
"Again, I apologize, but now I'd like to get down to business. Firstly, your name..."
"Yes, if that's what you're thinking. Of course it's not my real name. Only a complete moron would think that it was. No, it is a ring name, and not because I'm embarrassed about my real name. Far from it, I gave myself this name for three reasons. One, I love the band Primus. Two, I enjoy fishing. And three, because no one executes a Fisherman Suplex better than me. I couldn't imagine how horrible it must be to have a surname that actually has the word fish in it..."
"Okay...a clear dig there, but do you have any further comments about Justin Fischer..."
"Oh must we go on about that douchebag again? He's just jealous of me! I have the looks, clearly I have the talent, and he obviously doesn't have the beautiful woman in his corner. The only thing he's got is a title belt that he stole from me, but rest assured, that will be the last thing that he will steal from, and I promise you, once this crap stipulation expires, I will be claiming back what is mine. Next!"
Tasha was slightly startled.
"Okay...you were also briefly mentioned in Trey Baxter's..."
"Who?"
"...Trey Baxter...the MPW World cha..."
"Don't know, don't care, don't deserve it. Next!"
"...umm...well then...now this past week, the number one contender for the North American title Bliss has responded to your earlier promo..."
"Ah yes, little miss Bliss. The girl who's proud to call herself a bitch. You know something? As I said before, my beef is with Justin and I have nothing against you, in fact I respect you, but clearly you seem a little upset that I didn't call you anything decent. It seems that you get off on being called names, but immediately a few pop into mind. Quite frankly I don't think I wanna know about your love life, you can keep that part for yourself. Anyway, the point is that while I acknowledge you as a great wrestler, you don't seem to think much of me. But there's a reason for that. You see Bliss, you are quite capable of beating many guys in the business, but you have not been in the ring with someone like me yet. No doubt you're probably thinking of me as an easy win, but that's only because you suspect that you'll be rescued either by your manager or your dear old brother. But what if they're not there to save you Bliss?"
"Well...others could say the same thing about you and Ms. Biguns..."
"Shut it Jordan! That poor woman has put up with a lot of shit in her life, and ever since she came to MPW, she has been verbally assaulted by everyone she has come into contact with, and when someone gets a hold of a photo from when she was a kid, suddenly she becomes the fat kid in town. Poor Jasmine has put up a hell of an effort to become as gorgeous as she is right now, and when she is reminded of what she used to look like, what do you think it does for your confidence? Ms. Biguns is the most beautiful, loveliest woman I've met, and she deserves better."
"Is that why you decided to stay with her rather than join with Laura Tavares?"
"Of course! Laura seems alright, and she seems to be doing a good job with Bliss, but I have faith in Ms. Biguns, because she has faith in me. You think that I can do better, but she knows that I can be the best. I'm sorry if you are in any way jealous, but calling Ms. Biguns a cow is not going to resolve anything. I know you'd rather be involved with the epitome of talent than what little talent you're currently managing, but maybe when you offer me something, then maybe I'll change my mind, but the bottom line is that Ms. Biguns is a far better manager than you Laura, and she will prove it when I kick that little skank's ass..."
"Whoa, where did that come from? I thought you said that you respect Bliss..."
"I do respect her. I do respect you Bliss, but that doesn't mean that I have to like you. You have this attitude like you’re the best in the world, but you're not. You think that you're the real deal, but you're not. I am. You've most probably heard this a thousand times already, but I guess ignorance is Bliss...then again, I can think of a few more words to describe Bliss, but I'm not going to resort to that, I'm not going to stoop to that level, and I'm not going to give you the satisfaction that you so desperately crave. Bliss, I don't see you as a slut, I don't see you as stupid, I see you as another opponent, or more specifically, I see you as a loser. Bliss, I'm going to make an example of you, not just to you, not just to Laura, not just to your idiot brother, but to the entire roster. So please don't cry when I beat you, you should be glad that you're about to be involved in a moment of history, a moment where the epitome of talent puts on a show, a moment where the king of the world returns to his quest for glory, a moment where the greatest face to grace the wrestling race makes you a disgrace! And Laura, keep your eyes peeled, because you're about to find out what you're missing. Spoiler alert: I'm going to win!"
"Okay...umm...thank you John..."
John smiled.
"Again, it was my pleasure. Now pack up your things and get the fuck outta here!"
Mercifully the camera was switched off before that demand, but taking it seriously, Tasha and the crew immediately packed up their equipment and stormed out. Clearly John is too intent on making an example out of his opponent on Monday, but will he be able to live up to his words? Tune in to find out!
Basically, they met up at a ritzy restaurant where her date was supposed to book a table. Unfortunately he did not, and so they ended up in a sleazy nightclub, not exactly the perfect substitute, and not exactly a comfortable place for Ms. Biguns to show off her new black strapless mini dress. I won't say how much it cost. Anyway, already the night was a disaster. Rather than calm music from the Baroque age and a fine cuisine on a plate, poor Ms. Biguns had to put up with loud drum 'n' bass banging while enduring sprinkles of various beverages from the hopping crowds. Not exactly how she had hoped to spend the evening. At least they managed to sit at table, if only it weren't so close to the stage of scantily clad women dancing around shamelessly.
As the night went on, it also turned out that this guy she had met was not exactly how she remembered. He seemed to enjoy her discomfort in such a vulgar place, much to her disgust, and in what little conversation they managed to have, he couldn't help but mention how big a fan he was of the MPW Television champion, a name that she preferred not to hear that night. She could have also done with his attempts to flatter her by complimenting the size of her breasts. Seriously, she was excited about this night, but quite frankly, she should have walked back home before going into the nightclub. Unfortunately this did not happen, and what happened next? From the leering stares that she received from the anonymous males in the crowd, her 'charming' date was led to believe that she did in fact work at this nightclub! What absolute cheek! He even asked for a private dance! Needless to say, that was the last straw. She had to get up and leave, but unfortunately there was only one way out, and that was through the rampant drunken crowd. She held her breath and dived in, trying to find the exit, but when she came out, she lost count of how many times she was squeezed, and there was even a tear on her new dress! So much for returning it to the store...
Well, so much for class, dignity and respect...it seems that poor Ms. Biguns just can't get a break! With her high-heels in her hands, she marched all the way back home, stripped herself off and climbed straight back into bed. She had to call it a night. Things couldn't possibly get any worse...
Meanwhile, at his apartment, John Fisherman was preparing himself. He had watched the promo from the Goddess Factor, and he felt that he needed to make some kind of response, and so he had invited Tasha Jordan back to his home for another interview. John was suddenly interrupted by the knock from the door. He opened the door and greeted Tasha and the camera crew. They immediately set up the camera, John and Tasha were hooked up to microphones and with little to no small chat, they were all ready to roll.
The camera zoomed in on Tasha's bust.
"Hello MPW universe, I'm Tasha Jordan once again speaking to you from the cozy home of the self-proclaimed king of the world, mister John Fisherman."
The camera zoomed out to reveal John Fisherman, relaxing on his beloved black leather couch, with a cynical look on his face.
"First of all John, thank you once again for letting us back into your home..."
"Of course it is my pleasure, but before I answer any of questions, let me just correct you for one second. Self-proclaimed? How very misleading. That implies that I bestowed that title on myself. No, it is a title that everyone will soon recognize me as. You think I call myself that just for laughs? No, as I will prove to you and everyone else very soon, I am the future of this business, and once I've finally claimed my spot on the throne, very soon you will all refer to me as the deserving king of the world!"
"Umm...I apologize...but that is a very tall order, especially for someone who has only won one match since signing up with MPW..."
"I thought I already explained that Natasha. With every kingdom, there are enemies, enemies that are out to stop you from claiming what is rightfully yours. I've been robbed from opportunity after opportunity, I've been attacked from behind and I've been screwed out of easy matches. Every king has enemies, but unfortunately for them, nothing will be able to stop my rise to fame and glory."
Tasha coughed out of the awkward silence that followed.
"Again, I apologize, but now I'd like to get down to business. Firstly, your name..."
"Yes, if that's what you're thinking. Of course it's not my real name. Only a complete moron would think that it was. No, it is a ring name, and not because I'm embarrassed about my real name. Far from it, I gave myself this name for three reasons. One, I love the band Primus. Two, I enjoy fishing. And three, because no one executes a Fisherman Suplex better than me. I couldn't imagine how horrible it must be to have a surname that actually has the word fish in it..."
"Okay...a clear dig there, but do you have any further comments about Justin Fischer..."
"Oh must we go on about that douchebag again? He's just jealous of me! I have the looks, clearly I have the talent, and he obviously doesn't have the beautiful woman in his corner. The only thing he's got is a title belt that he stole from me, but rest assured, that will be the last thing that he will steal from, and I promise you, once this crap stipulation expires, I will be claiming back what is mine. Next!"
Tasha was slightly startled.
"Okay...you were also briefly mentioned in Trey Baxter's..."
"Who?"
"...Trey Baxter...the MPW World cha..."
"Don't know, don't care, don't deserve it. Next!"
"...umm...well then...now this past week, the number one contender for the North American title Bliss has responded to your earlier promo..."
"Ah yes, little miss Bliss. The girl who's proud to call herself a bitch. You know something? As I said before, my beef is with Justin and I have nothing against you, in fact I respect you, but clearly you seem a little upset that I didn't call you anything decent. It seems that you get off on being called names, but immediately a few pop into mind. Quite frankly I don't think I wanna know about your love life, you can keep that part for yourself. Anyway, the point is that while I acknowledge you as a great wrestler, you don't seem to think much of me. But there's a reason for that. You see Bliss, you are quite capable of beating many guys in the business, but you have not been in the ring with someone like me yet. No doubt you're probably thinking of me as an easy win, but that's only because you suspect that you'll be rescued either by your manager or your dear old brother. But what if they're not there to save you Bliss?"
"Well...others could say the same thing about you and Ms. Biguns..."
"Shut it Jordan! That poor woman has put up with a lot of shit in her life, and ever since she came to MPW, she has been verbally assaulted by everyone she has come into contact with, and when someone gets a hold of a photo from when she was a kid, suddenly she becomes the fat kid in town. Poor Jasmine has put up a hell of an effort to become as gorgeous as she is right now, and when she is reminded of what she used to look like, what do you think it does for your confidence? Ms. Biguns is the most beautiful, loveliest woman I've met, and she deserves better."
"Is that why you decided to stay with her rather than join with Laura Tavares?"
"Of course! Laura seems alright, and she seems to be doing a good job with Bliss, but I have faith in Ms. Biguns, because she has faith in me. You think that I can do better, but she knows that I can be the best. I'm sorry if you are in any way jealous, but calling Ms. Biguns a cow is not going to resolve anything. I know you'd rather be involved with the epitome of talent than what little talent you're currently managing, but maybe when you offer me something, then maybe I'll change my mind, but the bottom line is that Ms. Biguns is a far better manager than you Laura, and she will prove it when I kick that little skank's ass..."
"Whoa, where did that come from? I thought you said that you respect Bliss..."
"I do respect her. I do respect you Bliss, but that doesn't mean that I have to like you. You have this attitude like you’re the best in the world, but you're not. You think that you're the real deal, but you're not. I am. You've most probably heard this a thousand times already, but I guess ignorance is Bliss...then again, I can think of a few more words to describe Bliss, but I'm not going to resort to that, I'm not going to stoop to that level, and I'm not going to give you the satisfaction that you so desperately crave. Bliss, I don't see you as a slut, I don't see you as stupid, I see you as another opponent, or more specifically, I see you as a loser. Bliss, I'm going to make an example of you, not just to you, not just to Laura, not just to your idiot brother, but to the entire roster. So please don't cry when I beat you, you should be glad that you're about to be involved in a moment of history, a moment where the epitome of talent puts on a show, a moment where the king of the world returns to his quest for glory, a moment where the greatest face to grace the wrestling race makes you a disgrace! And Laura, keep your eyes peeled, because you're about to find out what you're missing. Spoiler alert: I'm going to win!"
"Okay...umm...thank you John..."
John smiled.
"Again, it was my pleasure. Now pack up your things and get the fuck outta here!"
Mercifully the camera was switched off before that demand, but taking it seriously, Tasha and the crew immediately packed up their equipment and stormed out. Clearly John is too intent on making an example out of his opponent on Monday, but will he be able to live up to his words? Tune in to find out!
